self help

I can’t write the selfhelp. I thought I could,

but I can’t. I feel like it’s all been said before

a million times. I feel like all you need to do

is do it, and that is the hard part because

people get stuck, and are afraid to get out,

don’t want to get out of the mud. I have been

that way, and no amount of self help would

have helped until I was ready, and by then

it didn't matter which book I read,

as long as I read it, as long as I wanted

to do the work, breath deep, look inside,

grieve, put away the booze, find God

in a taco shop. And so I can’t and won’t

write any more self help, so if that is

why you signed up, I am sorry,

but I have to figure out something else

to write. I have to find a way to myself.

I will be working on it, here, but

I don’t know what it will look like

in the end, but I hope it will be real.